Don't mess with Turkeys!
by Akemi Maxwell
Summary: Ok, this is a REALLY old fic, like the SECOND ON I HAVE EVER WRITTEN! The G-boys need to kill a turkey for Thanksgiving, but the get more than they bargained for when it evades their attempts to catch it!


Don't mess with turkeys!  
  
Leaves scattered along the road as the sun rose. Duo and Quatre awoke first; they are always the first, out of the other ten people. The rest of the gang was sleeping like logs. The two boys whispered amongst themselves. The table was messy from what happened the night before.  
  
Duo took a newspaper and folded it while Quatre turned on the TV. He turned down the volume so not to wake the others. Duo was done with his project, the newspaper, which was now a newspaper pirate hat and placed it promptly on the head of Heero Yuy. Duo sniggered and let Quatre see. They both laughed and joked around. Sleepy Heero just groaned and scratched his back. Duo retrieved a can of shaving cream from the bathroom and daintily sprayed it on Heero's hand.  
  
"Oh, Yeah!" Duo sniggered as he did the next hand. Then plucking a single hair from the end of his yard long braid, Duo ensued with Heero's torment. He gently swayed the tip of the hair on Heero's sleepy face. In a blink of an eye, Heero clapped both his hands over his face, splattering the shaving cream all over the place. Heero groaned and felt his face. Then let his hand drop over his chest. He then sat up and rubbed the cream from his eyes to see Duo and Quatre on the ground laughing their heads off. Quatre wiped a tear from his eye, took one more look at the mess on Heero's face and fell on his back and laughed some more.  
  
Heero knew he couldn't get mad at them for they just had childish minds. Ever since Relena gave him a home, he felt like he was a softy. Just to show himself that he wasn't, Heero gave a swing at Duo's stomach. Today was a lucky day. Instead of striking Duo in the stomach, he made a direct bang in the chin. Duo yelped in pain. His screaming woke everyone up. Relena yawned from another couch. "What's going on in here?" Duo stopped his noise. "Heero hit me!" He replied. Relena's eyes shifted to Heero.  
  
"No, I didn't you damn fool!" Heero took defense, not wanting to start trouble.  
  
Quatre laughed. "Yes, you did I just watched you do it!"  
  
Relena just sighed. "What am I going to do with you?"  
  
Duo pouted and went to Hilde. She looked at his chin and said, "Hey, Duo has a big purple spot on his poor face!"  
  
Relena shook her finger at Heero and said, "For shame Heero!"  
  
Milliardo ran in front of Heero. "Sister, you can't just shame Heero like that! You know that he's just a dumb moron!" Then very swiftly, he pulled Heero up by his underwear. Heero was totally off the ground, dangling the air. He screamed and was dropped to the ground. "And that's the proper way to handle him!" Milliardo finished.  
  
Heero rubbed his paining behind and growled. All of the witnesses laughed. Relena looked around. "Now, let's get ready for the Thanksgiving feast.." Relena's voice trailed off as she looked with a blank look.  
  
Trowa looked around. "What is it?"  
  
Relena turned to pilot 03. "We forgot about the turkey!!!"  
  
~  
  
The five boys were immediately sent outside to exterminate the bird in the backyard. They had risen that fowl since it was a chick, but now it's time had come.  
  
Duo took an ax from the shed and opened the pen to their holiday dinner. He stepped in and shut the door behind him. He walked towards the fat clucking bunch of feathers. "Ok, Mr. Bock Bugawk, your clucking days are over!"  
  
Heero rolled his eyes. They had given the turkey that name when they first got him. "Just get on with it!" He yelled.  
  
Duo raised his ax but the turkey attacked first. It jumped and scratched Duo's face. He dropped the ax as dust rose off the ground. When the dust cleared, Duo lay on the ground tattered. The turkey pushed open the gate and walked out.  
  
"That is no ordinary turkey!" Trowa stated.  
  
"Good observation, Trowa," Heero retorted.  
  
~  
  
Now the rest of the four boys chased the feathered fowl around the yard. They all tried to pounce on the bird and rope it up but it failed. Mr. Bock Bugawk was to fast. They ran the bird into a corner of the yard.  
  
"Now we got you!" Heero said evilly as he took out the bag that was to catch Mr. Bock Bugawk.  
  
"Hurry, before it flies away!" Quatre yelled guarding the sides.  
  
"Turkeys can't fly you moron!" Heero yelled.  
  
Without anyone knowing, Wufei grabbed the bird by its legs and tripped it.  
  
The fight wasn't over. Mr. Bock Bugawk pecked Wufei's head and wriggled free. It attacked with lightning speed. In the end Wufei was torn to pieces. "Just let me live!" cried Wufei, blood trickling down his face.  
  
Trowa came charging out of the house in pure rage with his sister's throwing knives and chased the turkey. The bird made a jump for the fence and Trowa also jumped over the fence, but in the process lost his pants.  
  
Quatre laughed hysterically. Trowa retrieved his pants and turned his back on the turkey. This was a bad choice, for Mr. Bock Bugawk attacked Trowa's turned back. The turkey's claws engraved deep into the skin. Trowa retreated and tended his wounds in the house.  
  
Only Heero and little Quatre was were standing in the turkey's way. Of course, the turkey wasn't really that stupid, so it was nature to attack the weakest, which was obviously Quatre. He charged at Quatre. He ran from the turkey and grabbed a box behind him. He then jolted around and trapped the beast in it.  
  
Heero came back and was looking for the bird. "It ran down the road," Quatre lied. Heero sighed and departed into the woods to kill a wild one. He was tired and didn't feel like chasing it.  
  
Quatre released the turkey in a country farm an hour later.  
  
At night, after the wild turkey was plucked and cooked, dinner was served on the table. Relena was thankful that they got the main dish in time. The party had started right after dinner and they spent it outside. Three teens ran into the woods to climb trees and play. They screamed idiotic things into the air so they could hear their echoes.  
  
"Poop in your face!"  
  
"Wake up little flower, the pee fairy is here!"  
  
"Grandma likes creamed corn!"  
  
When feasting time rolled around, they crammed every bit of food in their bellies, until they were totally bloated. All of the boys learned something that day. don't mess with turkeys! 


End file.
